Am I A Robot Addict?

Posted by Sir Alexander Johns | Jan 7, 2019 | Addiction, The Addictionary of Oxford English | 0 |

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Definition of Robot in English:



1 (especially in science fiction) a machine resembling a human being and able to replicate certain human movements and functions automatically.

“I am Robot. I have the titanium knees and artificial heart to prove it.” Oxford English

1.1 A machine capable of carrying out a complex series of actions automatically, especially one programmable by a computer.

“I welcome the day robots deliver us from this nine-to-five hell through which we trudge. I pray to but one god, and he is Sloth.” Oxford English 

Robot Quotes about Oxford English 

There was this show called BattleBots that was on some testosterone-filled cable channel in the aughts. It was just robots with pointy bits fighting one another. Oxford watched it endlessly. Seriously, he was glued to the telly, and the worst part was that they ran marathons! So of course, Oxford got it in his mind that he had the brain and the ambition to make his own BattleBot. He soldered together a couple of cans of Heinz beans and spotted dick – used the lids as blades – and tried to enter the robot fight tournament in Wimbledon. Needless to say, he was laughed right out.” Dean Cubbit (Wimbledon groundskeeper, 1995-2002)

“Well if you’d said you were talking about the bloke who made the spotted dick robot, I’d’ve known who you were talking about! Oxford English, you say? We just call him spotted dick and beans guy. I’ve heard rumors about his willy and the unsavory sorts he’s willing to shag, so ‘spotted dick,’ probably isn’t all that far off. I’ve heard he’s also created a robot that’ll scan your nethers and tell you if you’ve got VD. Honestly probably the only reason his knob hasn’t rotted off yet.” Murray Althorp (A real doctor who certainly doesn’t accept bribe money to harvest kidneys)

“Oxford loves automation of any kind. People weren’t meant to work, he says. I’m pretty sure he’s determined to live to be at least three-hundred if it means seeing the day robots do all the work for us.” – Richard Quentin-Stoop (Says he met Oxford English at a pub once)

“Oxford English paid me a considerable amount of quid to build him a robot of a more… unsavory nature. It wasn’t enough for him to buy a sex bot from Japan. They’re the best in the business – no, don’t ask me how I know – there’s certainly not one in my basement! Ha… anyway, he had very specific requests detailing the amount of holes, their levels of suction, and other demands that I’m simply not at liberty to tell you. All right, I will say this – there was a dauntingly large peg involved.” Bartholomew Pimplewort (A man who says he’s not a sex bot engineer but definitely is)


1920s: from Czech, from robota ‘forced labor’. The term was coined in K. Čapek’s play R.U.R ‘Rossum’s Universal Robots’ (1920).


Robot /ˈɹəʊbɒt/

If you or a loved one you know has an Addiction problem, whether it be drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex or any other addiction under the sun like our friend Oxford English, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.

This Dictionary entry was curated by Sir Alexander Johns.

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