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The Unauthorized Deathbed Letter of Forrest Gump

We here at Massive Phobia have obtained the Unauthorized Deathbed Letter of Forrest Gump, and we felt the need to share it due to its simple message from a very simple but beautiful man. Hopefully, all of us can learn to be simple too. Below is the...

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Winternet Addiction Disorder

A particularly nasty nor’easter pommeled the East Coast last month, leaving an estimated 1.4 million people without power. Heavy flooding, high winds, and accumulations of up to two feet of snow sent residents from Maine to South Carolina into a...

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Instagram Compensation Disorder

Who wouldn’t want to be Instagram famous? You’ve seen the luxurious lives that social media influencers lead. Flying all over the world. Relaxing at five-star resorts. Sipping three-hundred dollar bottles of wine on a Sicilian balcony. It’s the...

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Spring Breakdown Anxiety

Cancun. Key West. Punta Cana. Nassau. These places have a lot in common. Miles of white sand beaches and warm ocean waters. More bars than you can count. And most importantly, a tropical climate with endless hot, sunny days. While the rest of us...

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Trump Doppelganger Haranguer

Are you ready for the Twitter Feud of the week? In one corner, a successful, charismatic TV star who played a fantastic businessman. In the other, Donald Trump. The fight started when Baldwin gave an interview to the Hollywood Reporter and...

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Facebook’s Venus Envy Anxiety

Facebook sparked a site-wide controversy recently when it decided to censor a picture of the ancient Venus of Willendorf statue, a nearly 30,000-year-old prehistoric masterpiece widely considered to be one of the most important artifacts of its...

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Oscarred for Life

The ninetieth annual Academy Awards took place recently, and as can be expected, heavy social media users weren’t so much concerned about the outcomes of the Oscars, but the drama that unfolded behind the scenes. Although the Academy Awards saw...

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Cryptocompensation Disorder

Cryptocurrency is the hot way to make a quick buck these days. From Bitcoin, the most famous iteration, to the parodied but surprisingly successful Dogecoin, it seems like everyone is trying to claim a slice of the pie before it inevitably dries...

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Fire, Fury, and Compulsive Ordering

Fire and Fury is a controversial new book by journalist Michael Wolff, who spent months in the White House documenting the everyday dealings of the Trump Administration. Most notably, it includes explosive comments from Steve Bannon, who served as...

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Star Wars: A New Coping Mechanism

Warning: There be spoilers ahead. If you haven’t seen Star Wars: The Last Jedi, turn away now. Also, why haven’t you seen The Last Jedi yet? It’s been out forever. Get your shit together and go see it. People all over the world have been...

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Justified Anxiety Disorder

After nearly five years, Justin Timberlake’s long-awaited fifth studio album, Man in the Woods, is finally due to be released in February. While fans will have to wait on bated breath to hear it in its entirety, they got a taste of it when he...

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Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired | Day 1

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired After living in my house for 8 years, I felt I needed a change of scenery as my life just wasn’t headed in the right direction.  It was the first and only house that I’ve ever owned and I was never...

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The Unbalanced Being of the Day | Brian Cullinan

The Unbalanced Being of the Day | Brian Cullinan Do you know who Brian Cullinan is? Well, you do now. He’s the PricewaterhouseCoopers partner that handed the wrong envelope to Warren Beatty the other night at the Academy Awards. And now...

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Phobia List

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z A Ablutophobia – Fear of Washing or Bathing. Acarophobia – Fear of Itching or of the Insects That Cause Itching. Acerophobia – Fear of Sourness. Achluophobia – Fear of Darkness. Acousticophobia – Fear of Noise....

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