Facebook’s Venus Envy Anxiety

Posted by Christie Szymanowski | Apr 2, 2018 | Anxiety, Fake News, News, Social Media Anxiety Disorder of the Week | 0 |

Facebook sparked a site-wide controversy recently when it decided to censor a picture of the ancient Venus of Willendorf statue, a nearly 30,000-year-old prehistoric masterpiece widely considered to be one of the most important artifacts of its time.

The Venus’s censorship journey first started last year, when self-described activist Laura Ghianda tried to post a picture of the statue four times. In each instance, Facebook’s censors blocked her attempts. More recently, the Art Newspaper published an article documenting Ghianda’s efforts, and the story spread across social media like wildfire. Thousands of people jumped to Ghianda’s cause, or at least laughed at the absurdity of censoring the Venus.

After the news went viral, Facebook apologized for their error and decided to let the prehistoric naked lady grace their pages, openly stating that they allow nude art on their site. Since most people didn’t find out about Ghianda’s attempts until after the Venus was whitelisted, most people stayed relatively calm about the controversy.

“Her boobs literally look like a cross between acorns and potatoes,” Facebook user Amy Evans wrote on her timeline. “But apparently that was too much for some people’s eyes. I’m pretty sure this statue was in my middle school history textbook. I’m not even sure I recognized it as a person at first.”

“Pornographic? Come on. I can guarantee you nobody’s jacking off to the freaking Venus of Willendorf. There’s a whole internet of actual porn out there,” said Facebook user Corey Macey. When we asked him for recommendations, he got red and walked away.

Social media analyst and conspiracy theorist Patricia Martin thinks the Venus’s censorship was a deliberate act rather than an accident caused by Facebook’s algorithms. “I don’t know what’s going on over at Facebook, but whoever censors their stuff seems kind of sketchy,” she said. “Is Jim Bob Duggar running the show or something? I’ve never seen anyone so worried about someone being turned on by a statue that looks more like more an ill-proportioned garden gnome than a human.”

Others, however, are not so convinced. Ellen Grumble, a grandmother of six from Idaho, says she hopes Facebook “fights the good fight” to keep the Venus of Willendorf banned. “My grandbabies use that site, and I won’t have them seeing such filth! Back in my day, you didn’t see a naked person until after you were married.”

When shown a picture of the Venus of Willendorf, however, Grumble admitted that she was thinking of a different statue. “I assumed you were talking about that armless hussy they keep in the Louvre,” she said. “Never mind; this just looks like a boozer tried to craft a golem out of wet cement.”

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.

Photo Credit: Small Curio

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