Four Out Of Five Stoner Friends Think You Should Go Off Your Medication

Posted by Edward Ernest | Sep 19, 2017 | Fake News | 0 |

New research from the Basement Apartment Academy has shown that the majority of stoner friends have a negative perspective on medication taken for life improvement purposes.

According to the recently released report, this negative perspective is as a result of the effort associated with leaving the house, as well as sitting in a waiting room. A source with close ties to the stoner demographic also states that in general, stoners have a hostile attitude towards medical professionals and prefer medicinal professionals.

“I just feel like it alters your mind ya know?” said popper-enthusiast Clayton Hammond. “It like, numbs you out and makes you act like not yourself. Doesn’t it have like, wild side affects too? Yeah, like that’s way too much for me, I’d be so cheesed.”

Although the stoners seemed passionate about their anti-medical stance, the kitchen that is currently being shared by all five of the stoners, tested positive on most surfaces for batch or as adults call it, tobacco.

Steve Clarins, a member of the Kitchen Collective, added to the discussion by stating, “Bro that’s heavy, you should totally stop taking that stuff. Have you tried this Indica blend? It’ll totally make you feel better, true say.”

For further comment, we reached out to stoner expert Sam ‘Bones’ Robinson who stated that “What we have here is basically a question. How you’re feeling? You know how to feel it most. The biggest thing is that it all happens at once and you’re like, shit man. Like I feel for you, I totally get anxiety too, but then I just smoke a bowl and chill and watch some cartoons or something ya know. I went to a therapist once, and I was just like, this is crazy, like you don’t know me! And like you gotta keep going back there and stuff it was dumb as hell.”

At the conclusion of the Basement Apartment Academy report, the head of research, Dr. Tom Martens (a non-medical doctor of style), had these important words to say about their findings. “My team and I weren’t shocked by the results of our in-depth eight-year study. However, we were surprised that the government funded our project for eight years let alone one. Thanks, Obama.”


If you or a loved one you know battles Mental Health Issues, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.


This post was created with the help of Grammarly.

Photo Credit: Pat Hawks

About The Author

Edward Ernest

Edward Ernest is pretty much the coolest guy that ever lived.......according to himself. He's one of the founders of Massivephobia.com and has zero respect from any of his colleagues. To the outside world, he's this very nice upstanding citizen, but behind closed doors he's one of the meanest people we know. Yes, he writes nice articles and gives good advice. It might even seem like he cares about you and wants to be your friend. But please, don't be fooled. We've seen him kick a dog a with a broken leg before and have heard him on the phone berating his grandmother for only giving him a $5 birthday gift. Be thankful he's not related to you.

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