Dear Judge Mental Jones,
My son spends 3 months in his room playing video games in the dark, not speaking to anyone, and eating everything in the house. Then out of nowhere, he’ll emerge in an energetic state and goes skateboarding for all hours of the day and drinks beers with his friends and goes to keg parties. He can’t keep a job when he’s had them and some of his friends are leaving him behind as they’re moving on with life. It seems like he’s depressed because of it now too. He’s 28 and still lives at home and I’m worried that he may never change. What should I do?
Dear My Adult Son Acts Like A Child,
Where do I begin? First, I’m going to assume you’ve tried to talk to him and your son did the old, “yeah, yeah, yeah, ok, I’ll do it, whatever you say” routine on you. I invented that routine by the way. It always works.
Second, your son may or may not be a Manic Depressive aka Bipolar if he has high highs and low lows. However, I’m not a doctor, and I’m only throwing out possibilities. Does he have low self-esteem issues? Does he have an interest in anything? There’s so much I need to know to help you out, but I’ve only been given a small glimpse, so I don’t think I can help you much with your question. However, if he doesn’t have any mental health issues, here’s my advice.
Where the fuck is he getting money to do all these things if he doesn’t have a job? Are you an enabler? You must stop this right now, or your problem will only grow. Your son is a part-time loser/ part-time party animal, and you’re letting him be this way. You need to nip this in the bud, and it all starts with money and his free room that you give him.
It’s obnoxious knowing anyone who is 28 and goes to keg parties, specifically when it’s at the expense of enabling parents. Am I being too harsh with you? NO! Someone needs to be harsh to him, and you need a kick in the butt to do so.
Some of his friends probably have mortgages and kids already. You need to stop treating him like a toddler and force him into a life of actual expenses and expectations. Remove his gaming console and skateboard and give him a bill to pay or he will NEVER be able to transition into a healthy and functioning adult (like the rest of us).
It’s called tough love, and your son will be better off for it. He may hate you right at the start, but once he has his own place and invites girls or guys there to have sex without the embarrassment his parents being home, he’ll learn to love you.
And if he’s one of those brats that is entitled and doesn’t want a job starting off at the bottom of the food chain, then fuck him, that’s how you learn. Work your way up!
Cut him off now, or I’ll never answer any of your dumb questions again. You know what you have to do, and you’ve heard this advice a million times before most likely, but for some reason, you sent this retread of a question into me. Do you like wasting my time?
Wait……OMG! I just realized. He’s learned all this behavior from you.
Maybe the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree?
If you or a loved one you know battles with any Mental Health Issues, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.
This post was created with the help of Grammarly.