Dear Judge Mental Jones,
My husband and I have been together for 14 years and in the last few months he has started becoming increasingly annoyed and angry with me over what I perceive to be insignificant or minor things such as misplacing a sock from the dryer, turning on the lamp to read when we’re both awake. He is stressed about work and has some anxiety issues. I am now wondering if he is depressed, because he doesn’t seem personally satisfied with his life. I don’t know what to do but his constantly being annoyed with me is really straining our marriage, because I find I want to avoid being around him.
Dear My Husband Yells At Me Over Socks,
SHOUTOUT TO THE 14 YEARS! Now, if you’re “above” breaking into emails and texts where he could open up to one of his bros. (or worse! some woman at work…) then you need to sit this man down with a little bit of realness.
Start with facts, not feelings, and use the “I” word 100x more than the “You” word because saying “You’ve been distant” makes people want to punch you in the face. So say something like “I’ve been feeling distant from you” to own that shit. Don’t make it a HIM problem because that may piss him off. Then when you discuss fixing things, bring up the “Us” part. “I want us to get through this. How can we work together.”
You can’t live on egg shells, and if this man’s yelling at you for missing socks, you better roll up your sleeves and get to work on this before it becomes an even bigger problem. Once you start this process, then you can start working on your husband’s poor communication skills. If none of this works, it’s time for couples therapy, and if that doesn’t work…………
I sounded way too nice in this answer. I think I’m going soft on all of you.
xo Judge Mental Jones
If you or a loved one you know battles with any Mental Health Issues, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.