The Narcissist Combat Handbook: Exercise and Diet Regimen: Mental Gymnastics

Posted by Chad The Impaler | Aug 5, 2017 | Narcissist Combat Handbook | 0 |

If you’re going to wreak havoc on the life of a Narcissist, you shouldn’t just be physically capable; you should also be mentally capable. In fact, the mental part of the war will be a huge difference in not just surviving a Narcissist Attack, but will also be the way we’ll eventually kill them all. And by kill, I do mean murder……..of the brain. We’ll do our best to turn some of these Narcissists back to being regular people like you and me. But just like when you play golf, and you hit a ball in the woods, there’s just so much looking one can do before you just take a penalty stroke and give up on your search. In that same scenario, some Narcissist’s might pretend to find their ball by dropping one when you’re not looking because they’re huge cheating massive assholes like my Dad, who just can’t bare the thought of losing to his own son. Nooooooooo!!!!!!

He was big into the ABC’s, Always Be Cheating. We’re not going to stoop to that level, or we’d be just like them. We’re not going to cheat our way to winning this war, we’re going to outwit these Narcissists all the way to the end, and we need to be as sharp as possible. Here are some of my favorite ways to do so.

BOGGLE

We need to keep or vocabulary super sharp, and there’s no better way of knowing the best 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 and even 9 letter words than by playing Boggle. Really high-level Narcissists get thrown off by the use of exemplary vocabulary. They see it as a threat, like this person maybe sharper than them and it gets into their head. They stop paying attention to other things around them and might even ask the question, ‘what does that word mean?’ BOOM! All of a sudden they’ve become interested in something other than themselves. This is the opening you may have been waiting for all your life. For Narcissists that can be turned back to being cool people, this is the point of the conversation where a voice of reason might be heard. They have most likely stopped thinking of what their next Instagram post will look like, or in my old ex-girlfriend Darlene’s case, what guy that wasn’t me was gonna do her a favour by letting them plow her vagina for what she wanted that night. But no! There was no reasoning with her! She could never be turned! She’s evil through and through. I hope she gets cancer of the anus and dies. So yeah….play Boggle often. I’m not slut shaming here people. Darlene is a Sociopathic Narcissist through and through.

READ BOOKS

Don’t just read any book. Read self-help books. Find ones that will help deflect attention like Disarming The Narcissist. Other ones about feeling less guilt, like Soul Without Shame. Narcissists are master manipulators so you must learn how to resist the temptation of the guilt created by the manipulation. This can only be done by reading about and then practicing what you’ve read. You may make some mistakes, but practice makes perfect. You need to read about taking the Narcissist off the pedestal you gave them and think of them as someone that shits just like you and most likely has way worse diarrhea because all they ingest is your energy and then shit it out in one giant poop. Reading about Non-Violent Communication is another way to listen to them, so they think they’re being heard as they love talking about themselves. This way they still think you’re on their side, but when in reality, you’re just a double agent working for the C.I.A. but the C.I.A. is you and they fucking suck KGB balls. Yes, I know that is now considered politically incorrect to say, but there’s no other expression to portray what I want to say accurately, so I’m sorry. I don’t mean balls like dick balls. It’s just balls. Don’t read into it. If you do, you’re a Left Wing Narcissist, and I’ll be coming for you with my cock holster out and ready.

READ MINDS

They say for the crime, mystery, and police genre in the movies, to catch a criminal, you must think like a criminal. Same thing goes for Narcissists. If you want to destroy the Narcissist Apocalypse that we are upon, we must begin to think like them too. This is a slippery slope though as you don’t want to become one yourself. It’s like when Luke Skywalker becomes a Jedi; there’s always the Dark Side looming inside his mind to take him over. Same thing goes here, except my Dad isn’t Darth Vader. He’s more like Gordon Gekko from Wallstreet, and I’m Bud Fox. Actually, maybe he’s a combo of both. Having a Dad that was part Robot would actually be pretty cool though. Knowing him though, the robot part would connect with the internet, and some online trading platform and he’d somehow do some insider trades and then get away with all cause he’d do shit like that all the time during his analog days but with fixing ticker tape and shit like that.

I seriously went off on a tangent here, and I’m quite thankful that my trusty sidekick Dr. Jonas Von has not interrupted me once and let me free flow through my feelings as we discussed in private. Sometimes he actually listens to me. Thank you, Doc! Now back to reading minds.

If you want to stay one step ahead of a Narcissist, you must think like one. My Dad wasn’t around much when I was younger. However, I do have a Narcissistic sister, and she was always doing her best to manipulate me. I began to notice her tells. Mainly the stupid looks on her face when she needed or wanted things from me. When you have someones tells down pat, then you can stay one step ahead of them at all times. It’s like a pre-emptive strike, and you can’t get hit by any of their weapons.

For example, I know when my sister does this scratch on the side of her face when talking to me like she’s trying to scratch away her evil like it was a deep zit, then I know she’s going to ask for a favor. Once I see that tell, I immediately get ahead of her and start talking her ear off so she can’t ask. Or I’ll leave the conversation immediately with an excuse like I have a friend coming over. This doesn’t work on her like it used to because she knows I don’t have friends and she’s really mean about it too, so I just say I’m going to see Dr. Jonas Von. She believes that one and then I usually just go to the movies, preferably a horror one as I like to learn new ideas about escaping frightening scenarios and shit like that. And the last thing I do when I see that scratch is actually something crazy. I’ve learned how to say no. I’m ready for anything that comes out of her mouth, and I super pump myself up and say no. And when she persists to ask me to watch her children for two weeks as she goes to Las Vegas to party with her friends, I just punch her in the face with a series of NO’s and watch her face explode into a million pieces as my body armor is as tough as shit these days. If she tries to make me feel guilty, I just block that shit on my phone. BOOYAH! Who’s the mother fucking boss now? Exactly!

NO BLUE LIGHT AT NIGHT

This one is a two pronged exercise. So pay attention hard to this because I know what I’m talking about. It’s hard to escape all of your computer devices during the day. Even if you aren’t a Social Media Narcissist, you most likely are using a computer, your phone or something like it throughout the day. You might not be using Snapchat, unless you’re a really cool adult, but you most likely found your way to Facebook aka Housewife Heaven. I’m not trying to be a dick; it’s just the truth. Facebook is for Housewives so get over it. But yeah, the longer you’re on a digital device, the more chance you can be sucked into the world of Social Media and the bigger the chance you can be turned into a Narcissist. You’ll first take one selfie, and that turns into two. Then you’ll be making a story and showing us every second of your boring life. And then your friends and I will want to kill you, but I’m the only one with the guts to do it. However, this first prong is just the off shoot of why we really don’t want blue light at night.

When you go to bed, you want all the parts of you to go to sleep, but if you’re using all these digital devices, the blue light actually hinders your brain from resting properly. The blue light suppresses melatonin, which I have no what that is but I hear you need it to sleep good, and this blue light shit doesn’t let that happen. We want and need our brains to be charged and ready for attacks and to attack a Narcissist at any time. So take my advice and read a book instead, so you can be alert to kick some Narcissist ass.

To conclude on this No Blue Light Exercise, I’ve written a haiku for you to remember.

No Blue Light Tonight

Brain Recharged For The Big Fight

Die Narcissist Scum

So that’s it for mental gymnastics right now. If I think of anything else, I’ll let you know. Until then, Namaste. And……thanks to Dr. Jonas Von for not interrupting me once today. I’m growing stronger, and all you Narcissists should be shaking in your boots because I’m coming to rip your hearts out with my piercing blue eyes. Truth!

My reading list will follow this update so stay tuned!


If you or a loved one you know battles with Trauma (PTSD/CPTSD) from a current or past relationship with a Psychopath, Sociopath, or a Narcissist, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.


This post was created with the help of Grammarly.


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