Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Week 16

Posted by Edward Ernest | Mar 14, 2018 | Body Image, Self Esteem, Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired | 0 |

This past week was all about figuring things out and making mistakes mostly. On the site, we have one component that’s diary entries, and we wanted real looking entries. However, for some reason, I completely forgot that we were living in a digital world and made an expensive and time-consuming blunder.

I had our very own Amber Adams start writing out our Bobby Jenkins Diary of Bipolar Bear entries on lined paper with a pen. Then from there, I purchased an expensive lightbox and a nice camera to take even looking photos of every piece of paper. I honestly thought I was the smartest man in the world by doing this so all of our entries would have even distribution of light and they’d all look the same.

I can’t tell you how wrong and dumb I was and still am. First, depending on how many pages there were for each entry, it was hard to read, the files were large, and it was all just too time-consuming. If Amber made one writing mistake, she’d have to rewrite everything too. It was kind of a disaster, and I was Ed Wood.

And…..Then I remembered the big kicker. The giant kick in my nuts. The old cajone cruncher. I already owned an iPad Pro with the new Apple pencil, and it could do everything we wanted and even fix Amber’s mistakes within seconds. HOW STUPID AM I AM?!!!! VERY IT SEEMS!!!!

The solution was right in front of my face the whole time, and I couldn’t even see it. I was being so analog, and I forgot that I was living in a digital world.

So much money wasted. I couldn’t help but think nasty things about myself. Now I have to find someone to take these things off my hands at a loss. My inner critic had a field day with my business choices, and I began questioning if I was cut out for running this website and if everything would work out.

Eventually, I had to chalk it all up to an expensive mistake that I could learn from. I have to think things out more before jumping right in with financial decisions. Being cheaper goes a long way when you’re starting up. UGGHHH! I still feel dumb.

My cracks have just shown up and the only thing I could do to combat it was to just exercise as much as possible. So I ran, and I ran, and I ran. My Fitbit Charge 2 loved me this week.

So my physical health benefited from my mental deterioration. So I guess I was even?

AND!!!! Last thing. I got an invitation to a reunion party from a restaurant I used to be a regular at. I was excited and nervous and excited, all at the time. Excited to see old friends I hadn’t seen in awhile. Nervous to see my sworn life enemy (very long story as it was a complicated relationship). Excited to have my sworn life enemy see me because I look like a million bucks right now and I’m going to ignore her while laughing the night away. Yes, there’s hatred in me, and right now I’m pretty okay with that. It’s a great motivator.

AND!!!! As you may have noticed, I’ve never mentioned relationships before, and that’s because, after this person, I just needed to concentrate on me. I’m like a wounded puppy that just wants to be left alone these days.


Thanks for following my adventure of Being Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired. If you have any questions, I’m just an email away. Also, if you want to read from DAY ONE, CLICK HERE!

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.


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