Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Week 19

Posted by Edward Ernest | Apr 6, 2018 | Body Image, Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired | 0 |

With my exercise and diet routine going well, plus the positive momentum of building this website, I decided that maybe it was time for me to step out of my comfort zone and try dating again. My energy level is high so my thought process is that dating doesn’t feel daunting and I’m also getting sick and tired of hanging out with myself these days too.

Anyway, I met an interesting woman at a coffee shop nearby, and we started texting, which led to us making a date on a Sunday night. I wasn’t sure if that was a great idea as her birthday was the day before and she was going out with her friends and who knows what kind of shape she’d be in. However, this didn’t end up mattering much due to what unfolded.

On the Saturday, I was doing work later in the day when I received a text from my future date about how bad her birthday was going and if I’d come over as she left her birthday dinner early. She seemed pretty upset, so I rushed over to her place once she gave me her address.

When I got there, she was crying as she was triggered by a past trauma and now she just needed some company to take her mind off it all. I’m good at being a caretaker, to a fault, so this came naturally to me as I’m pretty good at listening and giving empathy.

Immediately after I got there, she got a text that two of her friends were coming over too and this is where things get a little awkward for me. I’m introduced to them when they arrive, and now it’s me, my date, her female friend, and her male friend. I’m doing my best to make conversation with everyone as that’s kinda what I do. Her female friend is very talkative, so I’m doing my best to make sure I’m paying attention as I’m finding everything super awkward as I’m the person that doesn’t fit in this room.

Eventually, her two friends leave, and that’s when things got even more awkward. As soon as the door closed, I was accused of staring at her friend’s breasts the whole time and that I paid no attention to my date at all. I was pretty taken aback by the entire confrontation, but I composed myself and responded that I was just doing my best in an awkward spot, and since I was sitting on the ground looking upwards to everyone, it just seemed like I was staring at her breasts.

In truth, I wasn’t staring at her breasts. They were just out there for the whole world to see. In fact, I was trying to look around them to see her full face from my angle. I wasn’t a pervert. I was honestly just trying to make everyone in the room like me. But it turns out; it had the opposite effect on her.

After I diffused this conversation, I hung out a while longer until she was tired. I said I had to be up early to do work and I’d see her tomorrow night. However, tomorrow night never came.

The next morning I received a text telling me that she felt that she was not ready to date at the moment. I’m not sure if she wanted me to give it one more try and be like ‘come on, let’s try one more day, I like you’, but after the drama-filled night, I was already exhausted.

If that was day 1, what would the rest of my dating life look like with this person? Not even her good looks got me to even think about sticking around. So I agreed with her statement, wished her the best of luck, and now I’m going back into hibernation as I’m too afraid to date again.

Yes, it was a good story, but being boring right now and focusing on me seems like the best idea going forward. I don’t need to be in another co-dependent relationship for the rest of my life, thank you very much.

Right now I’m just relieved that it’s over. So that’s my story.

Night Night.

Thanks for following my adventure of Being Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired. If you have any questions, I’m just an email away. Also, if you want to read from DAY ONE, CLICK HERE!

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.


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