Everyone thinks Improv skills are just for comedians or actors, and that type of thinking is just dead wrong in my opinion. Improv skills are the glue that helps a narcissist survivor get through their years at the hands of abusers, and once that road has been walked, they can then take the skill set of a survivor and transform into a proud narcissist warrior.
I’ll only touch on the abuse portion briefly as it could be triggering for some, including me! We’re fucking survivors, and survivors of narcissistic abuse had to learn improv skills on the fly to deal with people like my brother, who loved to tell me all about his prowess with the ladies and then loved to reiterate how I didn’t possess such skills due to my meekness and lack of solid math skills to get a job at Goldman Sachs because he always liked to say that “Money talks and Chad’s lack of lady skills walks.” I can’t believe I even wrote those words because it’s so triggering. I’m shaking with rage, and I might throw my computer through my TV.
Take a 2-minute break from reading this as I partake in some guided meditation.
Ok, I’m back. Anyway, once I got triggered by my brother, I’d go into a protective mode like a turtle retreating into its shell, except my shell was Improv. Even though I was hurt, I’d envision myself as a bouncer from a club, with my chest barrelling out, and I’d stand tall, not giving in to the tears that were welling up inside me. Then I’d think of the meanest thing to say, which was always a variation of “Mom doesn’t love you and always tells me that she wishes that you were never born.” And then…..he’d beat the shit out of me as he cried his eyes out. I took the physical pain because hitting him with the emotional pain was well worth it in my books. I know what I did sounds mean, but it was the Improv that made me do it, and I’ll call upon it any time my brother rears his fugly face into my life again. Also, just to let you know, my brother did eventually get a job with Goldman Sachs where his winning narcissistic personality was celebrated, and I hear that he’s now thinking about running for public office. God Bless America!
Now that I’ve just touched on some pretty dark stuff for way longer than this time of day can handle, let’s discuss how Improv skills can help combat narcissists outside of a coven’s nest for two distinctly different reasons.
The first reason is for covert operations such as reconnaissance missions. If you’re going to be a spy, you need spy skills, and Improv is the first thing you need when going undercover. So for example, if you need a drug dealer to get you the phone number to their supplier, who in turn can provide you with things other than drugs, like a fake Facebook HQ passcard with your face on them, you need to earn their respect. So when the drug dealers ask you to try their cocaine, but you don’t really want to get high because cocaine is the dumbest drug in the world because it just makes you angry all the time and you also can’t get a boner……that’s when Improv comes in handy. Start improving lines like “Never get high on your own supply,” or “No thanks, brah, I’m driving,” because these line always work as dealers have mad respect for those with a strong value system. When the dealers realize that you’re cool like that, they’ll slip you the suppliers digits super fast, and the passcards will be yours in no time. Makes sense? It did to me….And it works.
The second reason you’ll need improv skills is when you’re dealing with a narcissist, and you straight up need to either, wiggle your way out of the conversation because your self-esteem is getting damaged like a Mortal Kombat whooping, or you need to reverse your conversation as an offensive move. This type of shifting will irritate a narcissist to no end, which could possibly cause a situation to escalate, however, if done right, you should be able to escape with no harm done. Some weaker/newer narcissists will most likely not try to fuck with you anymore (People with 1000 followers on Instagram but none in real life), but others may take note and try to figure out a way to belittle you the next time you run into them (Pope Benedict). All in all, the worst case scenario is that you’ve lived to fight another day.
This level of Improv should only be put to use in the hands of a true seasoned Improv artist professional or high-level senior level narcissist warriors. If in need of training, please call your local Improv theatre for basic skills, and once you’re done, you can either, join my Masterclass which runs on Tuesdays at 7:30, or you can call your nearest Second City or Groundlings head office.
Want to know how Chad the Impaler came to be? Click Here!
If you or a loved one you know battles with any Mental Health Issues, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.
This post was created with the help of Grammarly.