The Magical Illusion of Narcissist Weapons

Posted by Chad The Impaler | Dec 24, 2018 | Narcissist Combat Handbook, Self Esteem | 0 |

Everyone thinks Magic is like Harry Potter (He rules!) vs. Voldemort (Fuck that guy!) and you may be partIy right. There are things like the Dark Arts, Necromancy, Alchemy, and even Voodoo (To be discussed later and it’s really cool). However, the Magic I’m talking about is more conventional and can deployed in the field with only a short period of training. 

The subtype of magic that I’ll be teaching you is in the form of Illusion. And no, you don’t need to have giant sets and crews like David Copperfield (Loser), David Blaine (Bigger Loser), or Criss Angel (Biggest Loser) to unleash this beast (All of those Magicians are massive narcissists who like to complicate things and make it seem like they’re grander than they really are.) For our purposes, illusion is the art of using the narcissists fears against them by dangling the carrot of what feeds their ego.

Narcissists love to feel important and be in important positions. So when we’re in conversations with them and they’re trying to belittle you, use the illusion of promise, by telling them that you’ll hook them up with an interview with a major company or someone like Warren Buffett, who can help further their career. Or even say that you can get them an exclusive invite to a Puff Daddy Party and that Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas is going to be there too. Blurt out anything that will help feed their ego. ANYTHING! Once you present them with this illusion of importance, all of a sudden, just like that, the narcissist is in the palm of your hands. AND IT’S SO EASY IT SHOULD BE ILLEGAL.

At this point, you have a very small window before your illusion disappears. So you must  manipulate the narcissist to either obtain information, a physical object like Microfilm, or send them on their merry way by removing them from the situation completely. 

Illusion can also be used in regular social situations, or even on reconnaissance missions too. Like if you were at a narcissistic wedding because all weddings are narcissistic, and there’s a person you are sexually interested in, but a narcissist is groin blocking you, then dangle the carrot of working at Goldman Sachs in front of them, and then have them fetch you a shrimp dumpling or two. However, you can also have them fight against their own kind by having them keep guard, blocking other narcissists from sabotaging your plan to play Goldeneye with your new best friend later.

We can also use Illusion during The Great War by obtaining inside information on the whereabouts of Mark Zuckerberg or his Senior Executive Personnel and their daily maneuvers during reconnaissance missions. Or we can use illusion to nullify a narcissist without having to actually kill them because your conscience gets the better of you, as your old friend ‘Marty’ has made you promise to save his sister, Kaylee (a massive bitch not worth saving), as he keeps reminding you about those favors you owe him for bailing you out of all those ‘Magic The Gathering Gambling Debts’ during the not so bright times of your narcissist abuse pre-recovery days. 

Want to read how Chad’s journey of narcissism destruction all began? CLICK HERE!

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.


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