The Narcissist Combat Handbook | Know Thy Enemy | The Sociopathic Narcissist

Posted by Chad The Impaler | May 20, 2017 | Narcissist Combat Handbook | 0 |

Oh, this asshole. The Sociopathic Narcissist is the 2nd most dangerous narcissist out there and like I’ve said before, differentiates itself from a psychopath due to the fact that Psychopathic Narcissists are born assholes while Sociopathic Narcissists are man made assholes.

Can a Sociopathic Narcissist be turned back into a regular person? The answer is no. They are so damaged from their life in captivity that evil runs through their veins until the end of time. They are essentially vampires that can die of heart disease or aids if we’re lucky. Ebola would be pretty cool too.

If you ever encounter one of these blood sucking demons, just run away as fast as you can. Trust me on this one. TRUST ME!

They smell insecurity from a mile away, so you’ll need to work on your confidence big time. We’ll go over that in upcoming chapters, but things you can do in no particular order are: Buy a cool car like a Trans Am, work out so you look buff, become egoless, play lots of boggle to get your mind in peak form, sudoku puzzles to work on your math skills, learn how to say no (that one’s the toughest), and so much more, like joining a Fight Club but for real.

Oh jeez! Dr.Jonas Van wants me to tell you something. He says “go to therapy or talk to a professional to discuss your past problems, so you don’t repeat them over and over again.” I think I’m his only client and he really really needs your business. Sorry, Doc, I’m just calling them as I see them, and that just wreaked of desperation.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Insecurity. Sociopathic narcissists love latching onto insecure people, so if you’re insecure and want to spot one, look for these things:

  1. Huge Ego – You can tell they have one because they always talk about how awesome they are and are doing cool shit all the time. I’m getting so angry just writing this. Before Dr. Jonas Van pipes in, let me just tell him that I have it under control…..Doc! I have it under control!…..That will get rid of him for awhile.
  2. Charming – That’s right. They’ll charm the pants right off you. Sometimes literally. It’s like they know exactly how to get you under their spell, just like James Bond does. This is why I hate James Bond. Well that, and the movies are stupider than Titanic.
  3.  Massive Liar – I feel like curdled cheese just thinking about this one. They’ll lie about anything, or they’ll conveniently omit facts that can pertain to their underhandedness on even the most innocent things. If they bought one egg, they might say they bought four. Like what the fuck?! Who does that shit? I’ll tell you who. Sociopathic Narcissists. And they’ll cheat on you too and lie straight to your face and tell you that you’re the only one for them, and they can’t live without you, and to not be jealous of their new friend…..I better take a walk now.
  4. Loves Being Admired – Okay, I’m back from my walk. Feeling much better now, thank you for asking. Back to this dickhead now. So you’ll also notice that this type of narcissist loves being super cool and wants everyone to love them for being super cool. Please don’t confuse this person for a hipster. The sociopathic narcissist is like a hipster times infinity times infinity plus one plus another infinity. They’re so superficial, and it’s all just a giant trap, as you’re the mouse and the cheese.
  5.  Entitled As Fuck – You could be as busy as ever at the local comic-con trying to sell your ideas to the lovely public that you’ve sweated on for over three years and a sociopathic narcissist thinks you should drop everything to tend to its needs at that very moment. The most unreasonable expectations ever! At your friends birthday party? Doesn’t matter! The sociopathic narcissist wants you to get tampons for her, and she wants them now. Yet, if you were to demand such things, then you’re being unreasonable!….I think I need to take a walk again. Be back soon. In the meantime, here’s a drawing I made of blood splatter. Blood splatter
  6. Zero Empathy – Okay, I’m back again. This time for good. I talked things out with Dr. Jonas Van. So yeah, essentially sociopathic narcissists have no heart, no feelings, nothing. They don’t care about anything but themselves. You may not see it, to begin with, but it will creep up one day and catch you when you need a hug the most. Like when your grandma dies, and she says she’s sorry by text and then goes to do mushrooms with her new friend instead of coming to be with you.
  7. Sex Manipulation – Oh, you’re pulling away from the sociopathic narcissist? Not quite yet. Here comes the fun sexy times like never before, just to reel you back into the lair of mass confusion. Don’t be confused. It’s a dark magic spell of horrors that will prolong your misery until the end of time itself. You’ve just been Black Widowed!
  8. Scapegoater –  Where is your friends watch that you borrowed? Oh, you had it with you in the car on the way home from the party you told me and now you’re saying that the event staff at the party must have stolen it when you put it down and you got insurance companies and the police involved because you couldn’t take the blame for something that you did, and now people might get fired because of you? Oh, okay.

So those are some of the signs that you should be looking for and in case you need one more bit of help, here’s an exact picture of what one will look like.

Sociopathic Narcissist

REAL CONVERSATION WITH DR. JONAS VAN

Dr. Jonas Van: That looks an awful lot like your ex-girlfriend.

Me: Shut up!

REAL CONVERSATION WITH DR. JONAS VAN OVER

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.


About The Author

Chad The Impaler

Chad the Impaler, is a super cool guy that was born into a coven of narcissists, but just like Harry Potter, he was the boy that lived. After 11 years of working at his local 7/11, Chad began to study the dark art of psychology (self taught, unlike those fools that pay tons for private universities) and soon blossomed into an expert of Narcissism and all related Narcissistic subjects i.e. Psychopaths and Instagram. He is the world's most renowned Narcissist Killer and the creator of the Narcissinstagram Theory. Which pretty much explains how and why everyone in the world will become a narcissist if they haven't been turned into one already and why we should all be really, really, really, really, really, really, scared. He's currently working on a Narcissist Combat Handbook which will most likely be a New York Times Best Seller with the help of his trusty sidekick Dr. Jonas Von (He's super annoying). On most days, he can be found working on his various hobbies, like breaking things for fun, building soap box derby cars, and threatening to smash people's faces in that remind him of his father.

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