We here at Massive Phobia were sent the below Unauthorized Deathbed Letter of Jason Voorhees from the director of Camp Crystal Lake. She found it in a bottle that was slightly cracked, and it, unfortunately, had heavy water damage. We did our best to restore the original, but for the most part, it wasn’t salvageable. So we have reprinted the letter below without permission from Jason Voorhees or the lawyers from his estate. Also, according to the camp director, when searching for Jason Voorhees at the bottom of Crystal Lake, none of the local authorities were able to locate his body as usual. So if you see him, we suggest you run and call 911 immediately.
Also, If you are out there and not living your life on your terms, do something about it now before you start to live or die with regrets. So thank you to Jason Voorhees and his poignant letter to remind us of this important life lesson. May he rest in peace and we hope that God has mercy on his soul.
It seems like I’ve lived more than nine lives, and as I lay here near the bottom of Crystal Lake for what is most likely my last breaths, I can’t but feel a deep sadness about the lives I didn’t lead. I don’t regret avenging my mother’s death by killing all of those kids from Camp Crystal Lake. However, I do regret my actions after I disposed of the original victims. My whole life has been about pleasing my mother and getting her approval, and the very immature part of me would do anything to feel her love no matter what the consequences. Yes, I did destroy the lives of numerous families, but at the same time, I was also destroying mine by not following my dreams.
Ever since I was a child, I was a big fan of professional wrestling and wanted nothing more than to become America’s biggest hero like Bruno Sammartino and eventually Hulk Hogan. I wanted to train with legends like Stu Hart, Dory Funk, and Killer Kowalski. I wanted to wrestle in the main event at a sold out Madison Square Garden show. I know I would have been one of the greatest of all time too, as I’m a tireless worker who always gets the job done. Also, I’m a pretty tough guy who can take a beating and bounce back pretty quickly, plus I can dish out a pretty good can of whoop ass as Steve Austin used to say. But alas, it was never to be, and I’m the only one to blame for that.
If I could do it all again, I would work on my guilt issues and live my own truth. Maybe if I did that, people would view me in a more positive light than how they do now, and instead of leaving me at the bottom of this lake to die, they’d be lifting me on their shoulders and cheering my name.
If by miracle, I could be granted just one more life to live, this time I promise it would be different. Instead of chasing unwittingly horny camp counsellors to their graves, I intend to chase my dreams to my own grave tirelessly. No Regrets.
If you or a loved one you know is showing signs of a Mental Health Disorder, whether it be Depression, Anxiety, Bipolar, Scizophrenia, Addiction, Body Dysmorphia etc., or maybe you just need someone to talk to, please do get the help you need. If you feel like you need to talk to someone right now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.
This post was created with the help of Grammarly.
Photo Credit: Captain Crunch 1950