The protagonist of AMC’s Preacher and the comic series of the same name, Jesse Custer is one complicated, angry mofo. From witnessing his father’s murder to being possessed by a half angel, half demon entity, he’s had one shitshow of a life. He’s been both a criminal and a preacher, and he’s seen a lot of hardship. Some of it he can’t do anything about. Some of it’s very much self-inflicted. Still, we love this damaged son of a preacher man, and his phobias help us pick his brain and empathize with him. Here are his Top Ten.
Syngenesophobia | Fear of Relatives – Jesse’s daddy issues put even Dean Winchester’s to shame. He holds himself responsible for his father’s death because, the night before his murder, he prayed for God to kill his dad. No doubt he’s got some syngenesophobia going on. Unfortunately lately for me, my prayers never got answered.
Chrometophobia | Fear of Money – After a bank robbery went south, Jesse left his criminal life behind and became a preacher. If that’s not a 180, I don’t know what is. No doubt money makes him pretty uncomfortable these days. He’s the only religious man that won’t take money. I saw my former pastor driving a Porsche last week. Being godly pays.
Glossophobia| Fear of Public Speaking – When Jesse first leaves his criminal ways and takes up his dad’s congregation, he’s scared shitless of actually giving a sermon. The cure for me is called alcohol, Jesse should try it some time.
Demonophobia | Fear of Demons – Jesse is possessed by Genesis, a being that’s half angel and half demon. Considering it lets him literally control people, he’s probably scared shitless of it. Again, this for me is called alcohol, and when used, I scare everyone, including myself with the demons I unleash.
Astrophobia | Fear of Stars or Celestial Space – Jesse is possessed by the entity Genesis, who careens to earth in the form of a comet… Or something that looks like a comet, anyway. It literally explodes the first person it tries to inhabit. Needless to say, Jesse should PROBABLY be wary of random entities that fall from the heavens. I’m so drunk right now that I have no idea how this relates to me.
Satanophobia| Fear of Satan – I mean… He’s a preacher. Pretty self-explanatory. I had some coffee to get myself back to normal, and yeah, I’m going to hell, so I pretty scared too.
Gamophobia | Fear of Marriage or Relationship – Jesse and his ex, Tulip, have a pretty complicated – and ugly – past. They used to engage in all sorts of fun criminal activities together until one of their robberies went south. This show is literally about my life in metaphors and some real stuff too. I’m so Tulip.
Arsonphobia | Fear of Fire – Objects – and people, for that matter – seem to catch on fire in front of Jesse. I mean, I’ve burnt a few dinners in my day and had an Ex that was an arsonist, but this guy is seriously unlucky.
Necrophobia | Fear of Death or Dead Things – Because you can’t really go digging up bodies and dumping them in holes without acquiring some level of necrophobia. This was my least favorite part of dating a psychopath.
Catagelophobia | Fear of Being Ridiculed – When you’re just wandering into random bars in the Big Easy asking where you can find God, you’re probably going to get more than a few weird looks. C’mon, man. SUBTLETY. It’s a thing.
If you or a loved one you know battles with any Mental Health Issues, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.
This post was created with the help of Grammarly.