If you haven’t seen the movie Unbreakable, you’ll have no idea who Mr. Glass is, and this whole Top Ten Phobia list will be lost on you. However, if you have seen it, and are now looking forward to his standalone movie, then you know that he’s a sadistic/delusional human being that thinks he’s/is a supervillain, with the most brittle bones a person can have. And along with all these issues come all his fears, and he has tons of them. The insecurities of men……..what losers!
Agoraphobia | Fear of Open Spaces or of Being in Crowded Public Places. Fear of Leaving a Safe Place – Mr. Glass always seems to go for a tumble when he’s out and breaks just too many parts of his body. So staying indoors suits him well, especially when he gets put into the mental health facility………..For a brief moment, I was put into a mental health facility, but then the hospital realized that I was just a terrific actor, and sent me back to prison.
Dentophobia | Fear of Dentists or Dental Care – Dentists are always poking and prodding, so they will no doubt break something inside of his mouth, causing Mr. Glass a great deal of pain by mistake. Deep down, he knows he should just get dentures and move on with his life…….I got dentures and have never looked back. A big thanks to Crystal Meth for helping me out with getting rid of my teeth in the first place.
Catagelophobia | Fear of Being Ridiculed – Since he was a child, people ridiculed his brittleness, and it’s stuck with him ever since. If you don’t agree with what he’s saying, watch out! You just never know what Mr. Glass is capable of. He did blow up a train that was full of people and all.
Dikephobia | Fear of Justice – Even though he was happy to find his nemesis, as he was comforted by knowing that he had a place in this world, Mr. Glass still fears being locked away by the cops for good………In my opinion, fuck the police! However, I do have a thing for guys in uniforms…… I’m so conflicted.
Gerascophobia | Fear of Growing Old or Aging – Can you imagine how easily Mr. Glass will break when he’s 80? Sucks to be him, but he kinda deserves what’s coming to him for killing so many people……..Or he can just be like me and live by the mantra. It’s better to burn out than to fade away, which isn’t going too well these days, but that’s a story for another blog.
Nelophobia | Fear of Glass – I just thought this was funny because most people are afraid of what they already are. It’s like he’s looking into a mirror…….Bad joke? I’m gone. Sorry.
Homilophobia | Fear of Sermons – Don’t you dare talk to Mr. Glass about his moral compass. Any sermon that attempts to demonize his actions will be refuted by words that will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee……..Oops, same guy, wrong movie.
Pedophobia | Fear of Children – Kids can be so cruel. When Mr. Glass was little, those kids made fun of him until he never wanted to leave his home ever again. What dicks!…..My fear of children is based on knowing that they’ll suck the life right out of me…… and my tits.
Phalacrophobia | Fear of Becoming Bald – When you’re a supervillain, you need big hair. So if Mr. Glass woke up one day with male pattern baldness, he’d be devastated……As a woman, this is also a huge fear for me, but I’ve been saving up, just in case I need a transplant. And by saving up, I mean I already have my blackmail pictures ready for a specific hair surgeon.
Soteriophobia | Fear of Dependence on Others – How can one be a super villain if you need other people to do things for you because you’re always bedridden and broken? How is that intimidating? Unless he becomes robotic somehow?………The only robot I want in my life is one of those sex dolls. In my opinion, a man who doesn’t talk is the best kind of man there is.
If you or a loved one you know battles with any Mental Health Issues, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.
Photo Credit: Universal Studios