Wonder Woman is all the craze right now as she’s destroying at the box office, so we thought it was high time we poked around in the original warrior princess’s gray matter. What makes her tick, and what’s she afraid of? Being an Amazon demigod’s gotta be pretty awesome, but Wonder Woman’s seen some shit in her days, and she’s got plenty of phobias…… for real.
Merinthophobia | Fear of Being Tied up or Bound – Has any superhero ever been tied up as many times as Wonder Woman? Seriously, we’d like to know if someone has a count. Regardless, Wonder Woman faces her fears head-on, going so far as to carry the Lasso of Truth to tie OTHER people up. I wish I had a Lasso of Truth for my EX.
Atychiphobia | Fear of Failure – Talk about an overachiever. Diana probably would’ve been that kid in class that reminded the teacher to collect the homework. She always has the world on her shoulders and is terrified to let anyone down. Side Note: I would have beaten her up if she was that kid.
Gamophobia | Fear of Marriage – Hades comes up with some evil as shit plan to marry Wonder Woman against her will. The fuck, dude? She also turns down Steve Trevor’s proposals on numerous occasions because she’s more committed to saving the world than settling down. She’s such a feminist! Gloria Steinem would be proud.
Theophobia | Fear of Gods – There are a lot of gods that end up being super shitty to Wonder Woman. She deserves so much better.
Hominophobia | Fear of Men – In early iterations of the Wonder Woman mythos, she lost her powers if a man bound her hands together. Yeah, that’s pretty fucking stupid – we agree. But it makes her fear of men understandable, I guess? Deep stuff though. Sexist men blow!
Paralipophobia | Fear of Neglecting Responsibility – Diana’s that tortured hero type who thinks saving everyone is her responsibility. I was like this once, and it got me nowhere. Well, it got me into massive debt, and then it got me nowhere, and then I cried a lot for about ten years.
Athazagoraphobia | Fear of Forgetting – Memory loss is a bitch. When Steve Trevor dies, Wonder Woman’s mom just takes it upon herself to remove her daughter’s memories of the incident. When she finds out, she’s convinced that she’s of no use to the Justice League anymore. What is it with moms and meaning the best but fucking shit up anyway? Mom, if you’re reading this, I’m not talking about you. Wink!
Hadephobia | Fear of Hell – Wonder Woman’s had more than a few run-ins in the Underworld. Since it’s the duty of her people to keep all those gnarly monsters that try to come through Doom’s Doorway at bay, we’d be surprised if she wasn’t at least a little disturbed by it. Isn’t SATAN the ultimate sexist too?
Nostophobia | Fear of Returning Home – It’s gotta be tough growing up on a secluded island that no one ever leaves. Once Diana becomes an ambassador to the world of men, she stays away for a long time. Her nostophobia becomes really apparent when Poison Ivy messes with her subconscious, and we can see Wonder Woman’s afraid she won’t be welcome in Themyscira anymore. That sucks for her, but she should take my advice and leave home without ever coming back. I’ve only been in rehab once, since.
Isolophobia | Fear of Solitude or Being Alone – Life as a demigod is rough because, well, everyone you love kinda dies on you, and you’re stuck alone. Forever. At least she’ll have Superman once everybody else is worm food. Where’s my Superman?
This post was created with the help of Grammarly.