Peter Quill: the charming, sarcastic outlaw-turned-reluctant leader of the Guardians of the Galaxy. As a half-human, half-celestial being, Peter had a pretty unconventional upbringing that led him to pursue less-than-honest employment. After losing his mom at a young age, being abducted by extraterrestrial pirates, and having countless brushes with death, Peter’s developed quite a set of phobias. At the end of the day, though, he manages to overcome them to be the hero the galaxy needs (but probably doesn’t deserve). Here are his Top Ten Phobias.
Katagelophobia | Fear of Ridicule – For all his attempts at “tough guy” talk, Peter’s actually pretty awkward. He gets defensive about his code name, “Star Lord,” especially since most characters have never heard of him or think it’s weird that he’s given himself a title. Peter sheepishly defends himself, saying, “It’s cool to have a code name,” but he doesn’t sound so convinced. It’s okay, Peter. We know your life has sucked some serious ass, so we totally understand why you’re katagelophobic. My code name is DR. MCILLFUCKYOUUP.
Kosmophobia | Fear of Cosmic Events – Quill is terrified that the Orb (AKA the McGuffin of Doom), which holds the Infinity Power Stone, will get into the wrong hands. Because the stone can destroy entire planets, it’s enough to instill a deep fear of cosmic events in our hero. The only cosmic event I’m afraid of is LOVE.
Nostophobia | Fear of Returning Home – Peter hasn’t been back to earth since he left. That poor, miserable planet is full of painful memories for him….. me too.
Octophobia | Fear of the Figure 8 – When he was eight years old, Star Lord’s mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer. His life changed in an instant when, as he ran outside moments after her death, he was abducted by space pirates. He’s gotta have trouble even thinking about the number eight. At eight years old, my parents told me I was adopted, but it turns out they just made it up. So, yeah.
Patroiophobia | Fear of Heredity – His mom had brain cancer. His dad’s a megalomaniacal celestial being. Before he found out his dad actually implanted the tumor, he was probably afraid of developing the same thing that killed her. Now, all he’s gotta worry about is inheriting his dad’s batshit insanity. Dear God, that’s my own worst nightmare…..from both sides. I really wish they were telling me the adoptive truth.
Blennophobia | Fear of Slime – Why does blennophobia come up so often, and why does slime play a factor in so many plots? I feel like this is, like, the third time I’ve been able to use blennophobia in a list, but I digress. Ego basically litters the galaxy with this weird blue goo (space semen, IMO). That’s definitely enough to scar your offspring. In my life, slime usually equals whomever I date because I’m attracted to men who are just like my Dad. I’m so cliche.
Soteriophobia | Fear of Dependence on Others – Even the man who raised him threatened to eat him when he stepped out of line, so Peter’s grown up to be quite the loner. No joke, the same thing happened to me.
Syngenesophobia | Fear of Relatives – His dad is fucking psychotic and implanted a TUMOR in his mom’s brain. Of course, he’s got syngenesophobia. If my Dad knew how to do this, he probably would have done it. Can you believe my parents are still married?
Venustraphobia | Fear of Beautiful Women – Peter’s definitely got a thing for Gamora, but her hotness makes him more than a little awkward about confronting her. I probably would have this fear if I were Gay, but I’m not. But I’m a proud supporter of the LGBTQ community…Just sayin.
Anthropophobia | Fear of Society – Peter hasn’t been back to earth since he was abducted. No doubt he’s afraid he just won’t fit in with us common earthlings anymore. Oh, well, at least we can always count on him to take care of the galaxy. I wish he’d beam me up to him and take me away from here too. Sigh.
This post was created with the help of Grammarly.