Trump Doppelganger Haranguer

Posted by Christie Szymanowski | Apr 9, 2018 | Anxiety, Fake News, News, Social Media Anxiety Disorder of the Week | 0 |

Are you ready for the Twitter Feud of the week? In one corner, a successful, charismatic TV star who played a fantastic businessman. In the other, Donald Trump.

The fight started when Baldwin gave an interview to the Hollywood Reporter and described playing Donald Trump on SNL as “agony.” Of course, Trump couldn’t let it go. He tweeted, “Alec Baldwin, whose dying mediocre career was saved by his terrible impersonation of me on SNL, now says playing me was agony. Alec, it was agony for those who were forced to watch.”

Baldwin responded quickly, tweeting, “Agony though it may be, I’d like to hang in there for the impeachment hearings, the resignation speech, the farewell helicopter ride.” He followed it up by saying he was “Looking forward to the Trump Presidential Library,” and hoped it would contain “a black book w[ith] the phone numbers of porn stars.” 

Twitter, which is always up for a little Baldwin-Trump sparring match, was quick to respond. It also got people worrying about who Trump would target next.

“He spends most of the day – and night – on Twitter,” said Ray Chang, a Twitter user from San Francisco. “I’m not gonna lie; I usually reply with something pretty mean-spirited when he writes an asinine tweet. What if I’m the next person Trump targets? It’s not like he’s running the country or anything; he could go after me – or any other ordinary people – at any time.”

Chang isn’t the only one worried that Trump will attack them on Twitter one day and propel them into the worst insta-stardom a person could imagine. 

“I can’t stop replying to Trump’s tweets,” said Chang. “It’s just so addicting. I know he could target me one day, but I just… I just can’t stop.”

Twitter coach Mike Branch, who earns a living teaching people how to throw shade online, gave us some tips for how to deal with the consequences if Donald Trump ever attacks you – or someone you know – on Twitter. 

“It’s actually a lot easier to handle than most people think,” he said. “It should be a pretty big deal. The most powerful man in the world is calling you out on a social media platform – but it’s easy to get the upper hand in these arguments.” 

If Trump ever insults you on social media (and with the amount of tweeting he does, you never know), Branch suggests taking several steps to ensure that you gain the upper hand in your back-and-forth.

He believes Baldwin’s response is the perfect model for your own comeback. 

“First, take some time. An hour at least. Calm down and rationally think about what he wrote. Did he call you fat? Accuse you of getting a facelift? Say you were ‘failing’ or ‘SAD!’? Ninety-nine percent of the time, the answer will be ‘yes.’ And this is a good thing, because it lets you come up with an easy one-liner that’s bound to have him seething on his golden toilet while he’s shitting out his McGriddles later that day.”

Most importantly, Branch reminds us that there are far more embarrassing pictures and information out there about Trump than there is about any ordinary person. “If he calls you fat, tweet that unflattering picture of him golfing in all white. Send him a gif of his hair blowing all over the place as he boards Air Force One. If he says you’re a failure, tweet him a poll of his approval ratings from a real news site. He hates that.”

If you or a loved one you know is having any mental health struggles, please do get the help you need. If you need to talk to someone now, you can talk to one of the many fantastic therapists at Better Help by CLICKING HERE.

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.

Photo Credit: Matt Johnson

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