You Chose the Bottle

Posted by Laurel Leaside | Jun 11, 2018 | Addiction, Community Collaboration, Reframe of Reference, Relationships | 0 |

This is two very hard topics rolled into one, so for anyone out there dealing with addiction and grief, I dug deep to share it for you. But aside from my selfless sharing;) it was actually great (free) therapy for me. A good reminder of the power of holding both stories together, so thanks for being my sounding board. It means more than you know.

If you feel inspired to write your own Reframe of Reference after reading this one, click here to learn more about it:)

Old Story

You chose the bottle over and over again. You made so many bad choices. You were given so many chances- that you threw away. You burnt every bridge. Broke every trust. You lied to our faces. You broke our hearts- over and over again. Became a broken shell your former self. A parody. A tragedy of ever descending depths. I was scared to see the end because I had stopped believing there was a bottom to this slow sad spiral. I feared for you. I recoiled from the drama and emotional vamping, the chaos and destruction you always brought along. All my fond, treasured childhood memories being buried under this sorry sad shit. 

Empathy was alway there. But building resentments over all the harm you were causing to others sometimes made it hard to feel. And I do feel guilty about that, but I don’t think it is unfair given everything (which does not alleviate the guilt).

I love you. I love you so much. I will always love you. 

You are so integral to who I am. Thank you for being a part of my story, I will always hold you in my heart.

New Story

You shined so bright when you were young (maybe too bright). You made people get up and dance while you sparkled and played, the whole room would come alive with your magic. You were a true talent, a shining star.

You had a beautiful child who turned into an upstanding man, I hope to get to know him better someday. People loved you. You found wonderful friends and partners in life. People who wanted to help and take care. Your mother loved you fiercely, loved you no matter what, and would lend you any support.

We all loved you. Despite the flaws, especially deep down, and I know you loved us all back.

I love you. I love you so much. I will always love you.

You are so integral to who I am. Thank you for being a part of my story, I will always hold you in my heart.

If you are battling mental health issues and feel that you need to talk, the people at BETTER HELP are trained therapists that are here to listen if you need someone’s ear. So don’t hesitate if you need to talk right now. CLICK HERE.

Learn more about how to contribute your own Reframe of Reference story here🙂

This post was created with the help of Grammarly.

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